Stress Eater Anyone?

I've never been one to stress too much....

In middle school & high school I would fly by the seat of my pants with tests and such. Never had a 'scholastic care' in the world.

College came around, and I got a little more serious because I wanted to work hard to get into A&M (and I did), but still, I didn't really stress out over things. I studied and prepared myself, and so I didn't stress much. Never been a big 'test stresser' like some people. Tests don't scare me...even though I don't consider myself to be an exceptional test taker.

When I got to A&M, I worked hard at first and prepared myself for tests. Towards the end I started 'flying by the seat of my pants' again, but still didn't stress. Did well enough.

Junior year I got engaged and started planning the wedding. 9 months pass, and I suddenly became a 'stresser' (but only for a season really). I would wake up in the middle of the night during the few weeks before the wedding with nightmares. I would either have on a regular, blue dress or it was completely ruined, and I didn't notice until I was about to walk down the isle. I would get to the church and find out that I was there on the wrong day. One dream I remember was that we were all snowed in (because I was worried about the wedding being in December). Some nights I wouldn't even fall asleep in order to have a nightmare...I would just lie awake and think of all sorts of details that needed to be done or were not going the right way.

I know that sounds like a really silly thing to stress over, but that was my first real experience with stressing (I am not just talking about worrying, but actually stressing).

Until now, that was the last real thing I stressed about. I went into student teaching....no stress. First teaching job....no big stress, just first day jitters.

HOWEVER, last night I woke up with what I would almost call night terrors. I woke up in a cold sweat, I woke up too hot, I woke up panicked that I had slept in and would check my phone over and over. At one point in the middle of the night I checked my alarms to make sure everything was set right. I woke up with horrible dreams about..................if you're a teacher you'll guess it: THE STUPID TAKS TEST. I know it sounds really silly, but I'm a first year teacher with a reading TAKS test tagged to my name. Today was also my very first time to ever administer the TAKS test. I have been to two TAKS administration meetings and have been told repeatedly what to do and what not to do, how I can lose my certification and all sorts of other stuff. Teachers have told me stories about a teacher saying the wrong thing and getting fired. And while I know I'd really have to do something wrong in order to get in trouble, I was really scared this morning when I woke up. Not to mention exhausted because of the lack of sleep.

When I first started handing out the tests, I seriously thought I was going to have to get my asst. principal to take over my class for a little while because my stomach was in knots, and I wasn't sure if I'd make it.

Everything went fine, and I know I was stressed for no reason. You don't have to tell me. I know it is just a test. It's not even a test that I have to take. I just feel like there is so much pressure on everyone. The principals, the teachers, and the students. It just trickles down the line. I know how I feel, and I wonder how the kids feel. Some of them have worked so hard in after school tutoring over the past 6 or 8 weeks, and I want so badly for them to the results of their hard work.

Today was the math test and tomorrow is my reading test (I teach reading, not math). Please say a little prayer for "Mrs. Coats' 6th grade students" if you get a chance tomorrow! I am really praying for 90% passing and over 50% commended, but we'll see.

Anyway...When I got home today I realized that I am a stress eater (most people handle stress a certain way, and I think I 'eat my stress'). I came home and immediately ate chips and queso and then went straight for the cookies and milk. That was my dinner. Talk about comfort food!

Luckily TAKS is only two days a year for me or I'd be sporting a chips-and-queso-milk-and-cookies body. Ha!